March

“Life moves fast.” I have heard this phrase from so many throughout my life. It’s a truth I have internalized, and I think it’s one of the reasons I live with urgency and intentionality. We have ONE life. We have today.

But, mixed with that urgency comes a guiding peace, which is summarized well in the hymn, “Day by Day”:

Day by day, and with each passing moment,
Strength I find to meet my trials here;
Trusting in my Father’s wise bestowment,
I’ve no cause for worry or for fear.
He, whose heart is kind beyond all measure,
Gives unto each day what He deems best,
Lovingly its part of pain and pleasure,
Mingling toil with peace and rest.

What last month brought in daily toil, this month brought in peace and rest. I spent the first half of March in the same rhythms of February: teaching, tutoring, training. The days were filled with their own pain and pleasure, and while I was excited to visit California for late March, the joy each day brought made the parting bittersweet.

But, in the second half of the month, God gave me unexpected joy and blessings. His heart is kind beyond all measure, and I felt his kindness deeply. I visited home to be in a friend’s wedding, and, in total, spent two beautiful weeks in California. I was able to visit many who I couldn’t at Christmas and experience spring.

One of my favorite days was spent with my parents in Sacramento. I visited my mom’s classroom and was so inspired by her teaching. The consistent kindness and discipline that she has instilled radiated through her students, and the fun she infused to learning drew me into staying nearly the whole day. She is my inspiration in many ways, and my gratitude for her only grows with time.

In the evening, my sister and brother-in-law came over for dinner, and I was again reminded of the simple joys of family, and how I don’t deserve the multitude of gifts God has given me.

I only had one day with my parents before moving down south. But, each day in SLO was spent with people I love. The past few months have been full of unexpected changes and burdens, and sharing everything with older, wiser friends showed God’s care for me in the deepest ways.

I celebrated my birthday during this visit. I uncharacteristically spent it alone, but I was able to check “See a Snowy Yosemite” off the bucket list. This day was full of meditating on the past year and prayers for growth in the upcoming year. Standing in the midst of the towering granite reminded me of how small and insignificant I am yet also of my eternal importance in the eyes of our infinite God: a paradox I love living in.

I relished every moment in California, but when coming back to Bolivia did not have time to settle down. For Holy Week, my fellow interns and I traveled to the southwest of Bolivia. We visited the Salt Flats, saw mountains and wildflowers and picnic-ed with llamas. This trip refreshed my soul and connected Naomi, Izzy and me on a deeper level.

Finding beauty in Bolivia has been an uphill battle for me, but this trip showed the unique glories of this country and again demonstrated God’s overflowing generosity towards me.

The Coming Home.

Home is an interesting concept. A few years ago, an acquaintance asked my favorite word, and I responded with two, “Welcome Home”. In the following years, that acquaintance has become one of my best friends, I have moved across the world and life has changed drastically. And my favorite phrase is still “Welcome Home”.

Living in Bolivia, in a sense, feels like being homeless: surrounded by people who don’t look or think like me, living in discomfort the majority of the time, without control of the atmosphere in which I live.

But, as time has gone on, my definition of home has morphed. I used to define home as where I was the most comfortable; the place I was fully known and myself, usually with my family. Home was an aromatic kitchen, a well-worn couch in a memory-filled room. Home also had a sense of finality and ownership. A place that was MINE.

The shift of “home” has been subtle. I still love the sentiment of a permanent place to be fully known, but in this stage of homelessness I live another paradox of Christianity. This world is not my home. My treasures are not stored here, and nothing is lasting. Because of that, I can belong anywhere. I can fully commit to where I am at without searching for a better place. Each home I live in is only a brief stay along the great road Home. “Life moves fast” can be accompanied by peace because this life, this earth is not all I have.

So, returning to Bolivia the first of April, was returning home. It’s where I belong (for now), and there’s no place like it.

Prayer Requests

• Future. The past few months have brought lots of big potential life changes. Pray for wisdom in decision making and contentment & submission to God’s plan.

• Discipline. All my travels and beauty have been restful and fun, but pray I can stay faithful to the daily work God has given me in the following months.